NEW IDEA OF THE DAY:Those fruity/bakery candles (And what I'd replace em with)

Well gang, here is yet another collection with very little thought behind; just a bunch of scents that BBW "thinks" are fan favorites thrown together willy-nilly. As with many of their collections lately, they're right on the cusp of having a really interesting collection but somehow it just misses the mark. You would think with last year's dismal White Barn Market collection, they would've learned their lesson but NOPE! With just a little more thought and less assumptions and pandering, this collection could've rivaled the infamous Sweet Shoppe collection and as of yet they haven't had a success like that since. At any rate, as usual, I thought of better replacements that would make this collection more interesting


Sugared Peony Petals - So in my scent list post, I was corrected by a reader that "sugared peonies" are indeed a thing. Despite being hip to culinary/gourmet fads, I never heard of that. So yeah it is a thing but that doesn't make it any less strange.

REPLACEMENT: Pink Petal Teacake - This just makes more sense! More people are familiar with rose flavored bakery items than friggin peonies. And unlike SPP, PPTC actual smells like a bakery item. PPTC was insanely popular, definitely an underground hit and even to this day, people are still clamoring for it; GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT..WHAT THEY REALLY REALLY WANT! I will never understand BBW's reasoning for getting rid of true fan favorites with no intention of re-releasing them and instead created new but weird blends that remain on the shelves.

Key Lime Pie - *facepalm first of all, like Pumpkin Pie, why did it take BBW so long to create a key lime scent. Yankee has had one for years and so have many others. BBW finally does release one..and they completely f*** it up in a way only BBW could accomplish.

REPLACEMENT:Tequila Lime Cupcake - despite what the name suggested, it actually smelled like an actual key lime. And because it was WB exclusive, not a lot of people got to experience. I was fortunate to have been able to buy and burn it and I really ended up enjoying it. Instead of letting it disappear, re-release that sucker and call it what it really was - KEY LIME PIE! Again, GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT!

Lemon Mint Tea - Why oh why do y'all insist on making this scent a thing?! For years, yall have slipped this toothpasty/dentist office smelling bastard any way y'all could...Newsflash...NOBODY LIKES THIS MESS! And then y'all have the audacity to call this mess "tea" to throw people off. Sorry, we're on to you!

REPLACEMENT: Southern Sweet Tea - can we please have an actual iced tea scent please and thanks?! I guarantee you, more people would buy SST than that LML crap!

OR

REPLACEMENT: Nectarine Green Tea - by far one of the most beautiful and relaxing scents ever. And it truly smelled like green tea

Vanilla Bean Marshmallow - OMG..*deep calming breaths. The Vanilla Pumpkin Marshmallow/Vanilla Bean Marshmallow/Vanilla Bean obsession needs to stop like NOW! You guys have a very VERY bad habit of taking a somewhat popular scent and running it into the ground! Ok we get, y'all are cuckoo for this scent; put this in the WB core collection and sell it year round but please I beg you..STOP PUTTING THIS F***ING CANDLE IN EVERY COLLECTION AND PUT IN EITHER SOMETHING NEW OR SOMETHING EVERYBODY ACTUALLY WANTS!

REPLACEMENT: Lavender Marshmallow - OMG HELLO!!! The Unicorn scent to end all Unicorn scents! The Queen of test scents! LM just makes more sense; you have a spring themed collection floral/fruity gourmand scents...that said which sounds more fitting - Lavender Marshmallow or Vanilla Bean Marshmallow? I'm gonna go with LM. Plus, unlike VBM, LM actually smells like friggin marshmallows! Y'all seem to have casually forgotten the kerfluffle y'all caused not releasing this candle and were perfectly with people (myself included) buy it on Evilbay. People are still wanting and are looking for this gem...again, and this bears repeating..GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT!!!

Cinnamon Sugared Doughnuts - If this was the past version of CSD, I'd be more excited. Sadly it's the basic jar of cakey disappointment from the White Barn Market. Why do ya'll keep on releasing this version knowing people prefer the original version. *sigh, I just don't understand the things y'all do!

REPLACEMENT: Apple Crumble - ok, hear me out... Granted this is more of a fall scent but then again so was CSD. With the right marketing and packaging, it could werk! Also I think AC fits this collection more; it's a fruit based bakery scent. It hasn't been in an actual collection since 2012. And y'all already know everybody, newbies and ol schoolers alike, we're lovin this scent when it appeared online during last summer's SAS. Say it with me folks...GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT!

 Georgia Peach - I feel like y'all just throw this scent in here for no reason; it's in this collection just to be in it - no rhyme or reason! Now y'all have a collection of either bakery items or drinks, what the HELL do you have just a random ass fruit in here..and not even a good one!

REPLACEMENT: Raspberry Peach Macaron - here we go again..another INSANELY popular scent from Sweet Shoppe that everyone went apeshit over and instead re-releasing it for olschoolers and newbies both to enjoy, y'all just let it fade into memory. And again, (and ongoing theme for this post), it just makes more sense! It's fruity bakery scent for a fruity bakery themed collection..HELLO!

Watermelon Lemonade - I Am SOOOOOOOO sick and damned tired of Watermelon Pissade! It is truly the herpes of BBW scents! It's already in the WB core line..why the f*** does it need to be in TWO collections?! It's like a canker sores on both sides of your mouth, one is not not any less unappealing than the other! Since 2013, it has been seen at least 10 times in 10 different collections..enough is enough!!!

REPLACEMENT: Summertime Soda - This scent has gotta be the biggest wasted opportunity in BBW history! It was the most authentic bubbly effervescent scent ever and it genuinely smelled like legit cherry lemon-lime soda. Only a few people got to experience this rare gem and like all amazing scents, it disappeared and hasn't been seen since. Instead of bringing back ML, bring back this hidden treasure so more people could experience it's bubbly goodness. One last time...GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT!!!

OR

REPLACEMENT: Cherry Blossom Sangria - this scent was the bomb diggity, a cherrylicious Shirley Temple in wax form! And again it, it fits the theme of this collection - fruits and flowers!


Mocha Latte Swirl , Praline Pecan Cobbler and Blueberries and Cream can stay

2 comments:

  1. Pissade!! Awesome. Don't be mad if I copy this and send it to corporate with a horse head demanding our needs be met!!

    ReplyDelete

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