NEW IDEA OF THE DAY: Winter '16 Scents Pt.1 (and what I'd replace em with)

So as y'all already know, a bunch of winter scents have appeared online...why I don't know. Fall just started 3 weeks, the weather up here in the Northeast has only slightly cooled and most people have just recently started burning their fall candles..yet according to BBW, winter is coming!

So (at the risk of sounding bougie) your average candle burners with less discerning taste are thrilled at this year's winter lineup but the rest of us candle connoisseurs are scratching our heards in utter bafflement over BBW's choices. Seriously, I thought last winter was a hot random mess but this year takes the fruitcake. So, as always, I have thought of better alternatives that would make these collections the bomb.com

Let's start with the woodsy/outdoorsy sparkly collection. Of course Winter and Fresh Balsam can stay as well as Winter Mint & Spruce and Cinnamon Pinecone

Ski Lodge instead of Chestnut & Birch 
I never got the chance to smell it but so far everyone I've talked who did said that it smelled similar to Ski Lodge. Why create a new scent that just smells like a reworked version of another previous scent? Instead of going thru all of that trouble, just release SL instead cuz it was a decent pleasant scent!

Sparkling Icicles instead of Sparkling Woods
I haven't sniffed this year but it just sounds unappealing and most people didn't like it. And it just doesn't seem to fit the vibe of this collection. Even I'm very over Sparkling Icicles I'll take this over SW any day. And SI doesn't belong in the WB Core collection, i would work better in this collection.

Holiday Pomander instead Spiced Apple Toddy 
SAT is TIRED and has been tired for years; it's one of those that keeps returning every year and nobody knows why or looks forward to it. It's basically a watered down Leaves..don't get me wrong, my love for Leaves runs deep however after October, I don't want to smell it again until next spring. HP is a virtually unknown scent, even amongst ol school Slatkineers. I'm fortunate enough to have one and I can tell, it's f***ing gorgeous; it just screams holiday! It's the closest thing to a true mulled wine scent that I've ever smelled (more so than perfumey ass Wine Cellar)

Holly Wreath instead of Sweater Weather
Attention BBW, Sweater Weather is NOT a winter scent. I repeat...SWEATER WEATHER IS NOT A WINTER SCENT. And why everlasting f*** is it purple?! Now, it take awhile for folks to get on the SW bandwagon but they eventually did. That said, people are now ready for the next best thing - Holly Wreath! HW is essentially a Christmas-y version of SW - you have the same juniper/eucalytptus combo but instead of sage,you get cinnamon stick with a splash of citrus..and it's amazeballs! Deck the halls with this damn candle!

The Original instead of Mahogany Balsam
First of all, NO! This scent scent should not have happened in the damn first place! Secondly, why oh why would you have MB in the SAME collection is Fresh Balsam?! Now I'm not a big fan of The Original but I'll take it over MB anydamnday! It's a pine-based "cologney" scent, so it has that goin on. And because it was WB exclusive at the time, most people didn't get to smell it. Just change the name (cuz The Original is whack as hell and super vague) and it'll be all good. Maybe give it back it's..."original" name - Fireside Pine

Spiced Pomegranate Cider instead Frosted Cranberry
I like good ol FC but I don't think it fits in this collection but rather the WB Core collection. And yes, we just SPC in the fall, but in my opinion its more of a holiday/winter transitional scent than an early fall scent

Alpine Cheer instead Fresh Sparkling Snow
I'm so prepared to take on the angry mob....FSS sucks! There's absolutely nothing holiday-ish of wintery about that scent! Now I'd be ok if it was sold independently on it's on, like Magic in the Air but stop putting in these collections. Alpine Cheer would make a better substitute - it actually smells wintery. It has that same sweet juicy fruity action but there pine notes to remind that it is indeed a winter scent


And now the New Year's "bow" collection...why is this collection out so friggin?! *sigh Holly Berry Balsam, Champagne Toast and Black Tie

White Winter Petal instead Winter Rose
I'm still waiting for BBW's justification for having a winter scents as a winter holiday scent! I can see for Valentine's Day but New Years?! Really BBW?! WWP makes more sense. Just rename it "Winter Poinsettia" and fix the cold throw strength and it'll be perfect!

Holiday Gumdrop instead Berry Vanilla Bean
Again, wtf does this scent have to do with the friggin holidays? Anything to make the basic bitches of America satisfied! 2011 had a treasure trove of holiday one hit wonders to take advantage of, including HG..something people actually eat during the holidays!

Twinkling Night instead Holiday Sparkle
So now Bergamot Waters is a winter holiday scent?! Kindly GTFOH with that stupidity! Bring back Twinkling Night cuz people were diggin it backintheday  

Cranberry Pear Bellini instead of Peach Bellini
Please BBW, you've been trying to make PB a holiday thing since 2012 ..and it hasn't worked. Just stop! And the fact that you chose PB over CPB...you should be ashamed of yourselves!

Eggnog Cheer instead Cinnamon Caramel Swirl
CCS just needs to disappear now! I can see this as a fall scent, but not winter! You already push Salty  Caramel in faces every fall and winter, why do we need CCS as well?! It's a damn shame that this and the equally awful Hot Buttered Rum has been a thing but y'all refuse to bring back Eggnog Cheer..you know, a drink people ACTUALLY drink during the holidays

Winter Garland instead Celebrate
All of the marketing department needs to stop what theyre doing, stand in a straight line and get soundly bitchslapped for this mess! Why, oh why, in the ame of lil baby Jesus why yall create a "new" scent that smells like Tis the Season when you already have Tis the Season out and about in another collection?! Does that make any amount of sense?! BRING BACK WINTER FRIGGIN GARLAND! People, myself included, have been practically begging for this damn scent for YEARS...GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT!!!